7 weeks pregnant? someone Please Help Me, I need Advice?
Ok, So i’ve known now for three weeks that I am pregnant. I am 18 years old and have a 2 year old daughter and a 1 year old son. I am in a relationship with their father although we did have a break in which he didn’t see the children at all and I brought them up during this period with no support or financial help off him. It was a really hard time for me as he left me in debt from gas,electric, rent & loans we had taken out for furniture ect. He also left me with his dog and refused to collect her, I couldn’t put her into a shelter and although I didn’t trust this dog and she went to bite me on two occasions, I still looked after. (She was rehomed to my mother who adores her). I really was left to pick up all the pieces and this caused havoc with my mental health. I already suffered post natal depression, extreme anxiety & OCD but this really made me hit rock bottom. The break up wasn’t expected, he went off with another women he met online. Anyways we are back together now and I left the property and went into Refuge with the kids. My mental health just haven’t improved, I love my kids, I love being a mother but I will be the first to admitt how hard it is. I get really ill when I am pregnant ( i suffer with kidney infections that make me unable to even move, my anxiety worsens & I won’t take medication while I am pregnant & I also became an emotional mess. Now finding out that I am pregnant again it has released all these fears of (how am i going to cope looking after my two children if i am ill, what happens if i need to go into hospital?, what if something bad happens to me?) all these thoughts are constantly running through my mind that I can’t really see the light here. I couldn’t go through with an abortion so please don’t mention it, it’s not that I don’t believe in it but having an abortion would have a more negative effect on myself than going through with the pregnancy. Besides This is my baby and I am going to look after it. I keep feeling something is going to go wrong with this pregnancysuch as (stillbirth, Birth complications) something really unthinkable. I am soo low and I’m worried that I won’t bounce back up. Does anyone else feel like this? Please shed some light on this situation, I’m soo worried. I can’t even take the chldrens fatyher into account because he will come and go as he pleases.
By Just Me- Can’t you accomplish anything other than writing foul mouthed words on yahoo and not even answer the question?? Please get off the computer now before your mother finds out! else you are certainly going to be grounded, you nuahgty child!
Thanks for your answers so far ladies, I think i may be just having a really down day 
Everything is seeming so impossible and then I hate myself for feeling this way, support groups sound amazing! I think I also need sometime with other women , maybe abit more of a social life, so i can talk about these things and have friends to pick me up 
Mr Smooth, obviously not everyone has been gifted with the upbringing and best start in life as you!, Don’t judge me I am doing good already, I’m the first person in my family to not have a drink or dug problem and to be able To keep my children. It’s sad that it’s like that but unfortunately true. Sorry if my life doesn’t fit your standards but your attitude certainly doesn’t meet mine.
Thank you S for your answer, If i take on that view of life I believe it will make this situation so much easier for me. I also believe in fate and karma and maybe I should put these views before the ones I’m experiencing know, What’s ment to be is ment to be.
Thanks 
Tagged with: advice • help • Need • Please • Pregnant • someone • weeks
Filed under: Depression during Pregnancy Effects on Baby
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Reading your situation I suggest adoption, that would be the next best, or might be even the best thing for your upcoming child. If you really are up to keeping this child, there are strong support groups for your situation out there where you live. Just search them up on Google.
Wow. That was so rude what that person said. Anyway ignore them. There are a lot of social programs available for you and your children. Look it up on google! That’s what I did. There are lots of places that can help you. Also, if you are going to be some what “disabled” in a sense due to the pregnancy, you will be able to get disability and they will provide someone to you to help care for your children. Honestly my best advice for you is to contact your social services in your area and they can give you all the resources you need!!!!
And as for the man GET RID OF HIM. If he is not supportive and stresses you out, kick him to the curb. That is the LAST thing you need right now. Trust me. It’s time that YOU start calling the shots and tell him to beat it. Because if you don’t, as you said, it is affecting your mental health and you do not want anything happening to your new baby! It’ll be the most freeing thing you will ever do. Trust me, I’ve done it.
Be strong and good luck girl!
After reading and thinking about your question the only advise I can give you is what I have learned along my own journey. I am a strong believer in fate and karma, I dont believe we are sent any challenges that we can not turn into a positive if we look deep inside for long enough. Also I dont believe that we are sent anything that we cant handle. If you are meant to have this baby, you will, if you are meant to have only the two you have I believe it will be taken out of your hands. But please stay positive as whatever is meant to be will be.
Peace and happiness your way
I feel really bad for you..it must have been tough dealing with two kids and a mess up…but we are made strong and we survive. I strongly believe that such situations only improve our nerves and eventually we are stronger and seasoned to deal with life.
If you want the child, have it. you must stop fearing the worst and start planning for a better , more managed future. i agree with the person who said you better get rid of this man. he is no good if you cant trust him to be with you tomorrow. relationships thrive on this trust and moving together in life requires a lot of assurance from both parties to help manage all the days and nights. you are strong enough to handle it all….and then who knows what good life might bring to you when you move on. i know it is easier to stick to your situations then to bring about such a radical change but trust me it works for the best.
settle down to enjoy your third time motherhood and your kids will adjust to the changes too…nature will take care of most of it. Best of luck.
What a jerk Just Me is– why are people so evil these days? Geez– you should report that comment…it violates Yahoo Answers…
Anyways, I am so sorry for your situation but I think you are doing the right thing by keeping the baby, but it will be very, very tough as you already have two young ones. I have severe OCD as well and went off the meds years ago as I don’t like being heavily medicated. The constant worrying is partly a choice. I know I know, easier said than done, but from what I have read…you HAVE to learn how to let go. Part of OCD is feeling that by worrying about things, we are controlling the situation. When, in reality, we cannot control anything and what will happen, will happen, whether we worry or not. It is highly unlikely you will have a still birth unless you are heavily doing drugs and drinking during pregnancy. Therefore, you can worry about it, but it is probably not going to happen. And God forbid it did, there is nothing you could have done to stop it so worrying is pointless (but it doesn’t feel that way, I know).
I have this intense fear I will hurt my new born…even though I have never hit anyone or anything…and am not aggressive in nature at all…and yet, I cannot shake the thought of me shaking my baby. It’s awful– I also have an extreme fear of contracting HIV and heights.
For the OCD part, I recommend getting some behavioral therapy or even reading a behavioral workbook and trying to make some minor daily changes, working towards the big changes. My mom has helped me. For example, I just have my HIV test done for pregnancy and was a complete mess afterwards (even though I just tested three months ago). It took everything I had to continue going to work, clean my house, and NOT call the office demanding the results (they have a no news is good news policy). Even though I am still worried, by letting go of my fear and working through it, I feel less stressful.
In regards to your boyfriend, you really need to make sure he’s the right guy because he’s never been around with a newborn, which is MUCH harder than the pregnancy. Is he mature and responsible enough to stick around? If not, you should cut your losses now and move on– there are plenty of government assistance programs that can help you.
Good luck
I feel very very sad for you, and disturbed that you have so many children at such a young age. You are not an adult. Your children are going to be raised by a child. What on earth pushed you into such a promiscuous lifestyle at such an incredibly young age? Please get a permanent birth control fix!
Hey,
I’m 18 years old as well & i’m pregnant with twins. I also suffer depression & have been suicidal & put on ssi for depression..
i must say everyone has those worries “what if something goes wrong” “what if this or that” its a bit scary to think about it.
But over all god will never put anything on you that you cant handle take it easy. I’m glad your not going to abort your baby thats a good choice.
As far as your boyfriend goes don’t depend on him at all act as if he is not there. because if he tries to leave again you will right back to square 1.
I am axually about to marry the man i’m having kids by so i cant say i completely relate but my father came and left as he pleased.. Your going to be fine! you have three beautiful kids to raise.
i once worried about the stillbirth, birth complications, vanishing twin syndrome (where one just disappears) is my finance going to stick around or leave when times get hard?
but i realized everything will be fine thats just the nervs kicking it your nervous !
i will keep you in my prayers mama you will be fine!